I did not even know I was angry. The subject of forgiveness came up over and over again, and I ran through the lists of people who had offended me throughout my life. The easiest recalls were old boyfriends, their new girlfriends/wives whose relationship(s) coincided with ours, backstabbing roommates, and cheating coaches. Yet, as I brought up individual names in my mind, each name was easily dismissed. I was not angry at them anymore. I was over it now, and I had been over it for quite some time.
Yet, forgiveness kept coming up until finally I realized I was angry at myself. I was angry that I had not yet figured out how to budget the money properly and angry I did not yet make enough to enjoy the life I wanted to live. I was mad I had let myself gain 15 pounds and now had a miniature gut for my tall, slim frame. I was upset that balance was still nowhere in sight. It was the kids, the blog, my husband, or social media. I still could not manage equals parts to all, and most times I made the wrong choice as a priority. I was angry I was still making the wrong choices.
I took out my anger on the ones I loved not because they had done anything but because I was mad at myself. Then I got upset for taking it out on them, and inside I harbored bitterness.
Life had dealt one too many blows, and I had not recovered. I was mad at myself for not recovering because life is life. It goes on, and there was no time for me to be upset about it. Then here came this young lady who spoke to my soul.
I talked a big talk but self-love was not a part of my journey. I preached on finding yourself, loving yourself, and then being yourself, but I did not live it.
Of course, I proceeded to be mad at myself for not loving myself, and it was there I recognized that I had to forgive myself. If I had learned nothing else on my path to purpose, the statement that stuck with me the most was “Give yourself grace.”
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As I embark on this new journey to self-love, I challenge you to do the same – give yourself grace…please join me this week with Cameron over at theafroclub.org as she also gives us a much needed word on how to treat yourself and what self-love really looks like…
***
Check out some other pieces on self-love and self-care.
1. Learning to Love Yourself – Growing & Glowing
2. A Self-Care Routine for Tired Mamas
4. 7 Mom Hacks for Surviving Motherhood
What are some things you discovered on your journey to self-love?
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I’ve discovered that I’ve believed lies about myself, often without realizing it, and that I need to find out what God says about me in His Word and start believing it. ❤
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I did too. I just recently started reading Lysa TerKeurst’s “Uninvited” that I purchased like 4 years ago, and I’m so glad I did. I’m working through so many of those lies. God had me start there for a specific and intentional reason!
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Not sure why, but WordPress put my reply way down there in the comments somewhere!
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Self-care and self-love is so important, especially as moms. But I’m learning it’s not necessarily achieved by quick fixes like a night time soak in the bath, or a few hours in a thrift store by myself :). Instead, self-care and self-love for me looks like a string of choices (some difficult): going to bed earlier, cutting back on the amount of sugar I put in my coffee (ahem), training my eyes to see blessings instead of misfortunes, choosing to save instead of impulse buy…. Not a very sexy list, I’m afraid, but key to taking care of myself and loving myself!
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Ouch! Yes Sarah. Sometimes self-care is making life changes daily, even when we don’t feel like it because we need it!
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Learning to love myself has been a life-long struggle for me. I’m not there yet. 🙂 But I am working on it and will continue to work on it until I get there. God Bless!
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Yes He sure will. He works with us all bit by bit – day by day!
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Great insight! I’ve learned that true self-care is not self-ish of self-centered. It’s just a healthy investment in ourselves where we need it the most. To bring the balance in life you mentioned. And to care for our soul.
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So true Karen. Creating balance has been my lifelong purpose I believe, and to share my outtakes along the way so that others can learn how to create their own balance with the help of God Himself.
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Girl a word I definitely needed.
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I needed it too. I was so glad she wrote it!
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Great post! I get frustrated with myself all the time. Sometimes I just shut down then hate myself for shutting down. I’ve been learning a lot about self grace 💕. Blessings and best wishes on your personal journey 👐
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Thank you love! I think we are harder on ourselves than anyone else could ever be on us. Learning our value is so important but it’s a journey. We learn layer by layer.
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Indeed 👐
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I’m getting sooo much better these days at loving myself for who I am and how God has worked in my life!! I’m finally getting and understanding my purpose here❤️
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Every time I learn something new, He reveals more. I’m learning that life happens in layers and I need to enjoy each one along the way – not always easy for me but so needed.
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Yup absolutely.. there’s so much to learn and so much room for growing ..especially when were in His word!!
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Wow! Praise God! He knows us better than we know ourselves!
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Yes He does!!!
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Thank you, dear, for another uplifting and inspiring post. xo
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You are so welcome my dear friend!
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🙂
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Does anyone really have life figured out on this side? Sometimes I think we’d have to wait until we get to Heaven. Thanks for sharing, Brittany. Blessings to you!
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No, I don’t think any of us do Boma. We are all just doing the best that we can.
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“Give yourself grace.” Yes! How important that is! It has taken such a long time for me to understand that as a repentant perfectionist. Thankful for more lessons to learn from you here today. Great post!
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Thank you so much Gretchen. I share my findings and the beautiful findings of others along the way so we can all grow together.
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I’m such a doer and fixer. For others and sometimes I neglect to love myself. A week ago I took a day to just be in God’s presence. It was sweet. I came to Ephesians 2:7. It talks about God’s kindness to us. I immediately wanted to share it, call a friend, blog about it, then it’s like God said inaudibly, “Just sit here and allow Me to love you. This word is for you. Stay a while. Let Me breathe life back into you.” So I did. And the next day I felt refreshed. Your blog hits home for me, Brittany!
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What a great journey you’re on!
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Self Love And Self Care Is Something That I’ve Struggled With Throughout The Years. I’m Always Putting Everyone Around Before Myself, Basically Neglecting Me. While I Do Love Helping And Caring For Others, Made A Promise To Myself This Year To Focus And Build Me. Lovely Post.
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